Friday, July 29, 2011

Definition of Insanity



Wasn't it Einstein that said the definition of insanity was doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results? Yea. About that. After 30+ years of being told by experts and having physical proof that I am dairy intolerant, I am going to make a concerted effort to kick the habit. I am sure I would feel better kicking gluten, processed foods, caffeine, alcohol, etc, also, HOWEVER, I am going to start with the obvious culprit and just see what happens when I try to remove it from my diet.

Here's the deal. I had my one and only "cup" (read: giant mug) of coffee this morning, black. Tasted just find. Liked it, in fact, just didn't scratch the itch, though, you know? Like a whole different drink. Not a bad one, just not the one I've come to rely on. And, I fully expected to feel like a whole new woman five minutes after skipping the cream. I don't know where people got the idea that I am patient, I am simply not. That's why it's just one big cosmic joke that I was given one of the most annoying people on the planet to spend my days/months/years/lifetimes with.

Took all my Starbucks Double Shots that lined the pantry and fridge, put them in a used shopping bag and dumped them off at Nancy's house this morning before I could change my mind. They are just one more example of something I crave, fantasize about, look at my watch to see if it's too late in the day to have, basically go nuts over, and then feel crummy for hours after consuming. Then the next day I go through the same torment all over again.

"You've got to break the loop," STM said. "One day at a time it. Don't think about never having another one again, just don't have one today."

The (annoying) voice of reason.

Woohoo woke up this morning, first words out of her mouth (after lying and saying, "I'm up, I'm UP!" when clearly she was not), was, "How many psychiatrists does it take to change a light bulb?"

"I don't know, " I said.

"Zero. First the lightbulb has to want to change."

This ol "lightbulb" is ready to make one change.




9 comments:

Jamie said...

Good luck!!!

Dee said...

Carrie--go for it! Isn't there a Chinese proverb about the journey of a 1,000 miles starting with the first step? You took that first step today. I suspect it may be the hardest one. Congratulations!

kario said...

Good luck, my friend. I love STM for adding his two cents in, but I'm clenching my jaw right along with you as he says it.

Hope everyone in the house is supportive and understanding and I hope that, within a few days you start to feel so good that you don't look back.

Love.

Brenda said...

I'm with STM. I have to take things 20 min at a time or I'll never do it. I was able to kick most dairy by not eating the things I associate with dairy. So I end up eating mostly salads and sauteed veggies.

But, but ... isn't creamer non-dairy?

Lilith said...

I'm not patient either. Maybe that's why we got out kids:)

Good luck.

fullsoulahead.com said...

Love.

Wanda said...

I feel ya. I LOVE black coffee--Love. It. However, SO likes white coffee and uses...coconut milk. Just a thought. May not scratch the itch. May come close. Just a thought.

Elizabeth said...

Sigh.

Amber said...

This made me LOL!

WHat about soy creamer?

:)