Three Kinds of People

I used to think I wanted to be famous. I don't anymore. None-the-less, in my tiny corner of the world, I've become so. I can hardly step foot out of my house without someone spotting me and saying, "I loved your Letter to the Editor! Thanks for helping with the poop problem!" I put a letter in our neighborhood area paper and apparently everyone but the people I needed to read it, read it.

Yes, ladies and gentleman, I've become the poop police. For whatever reason (and believe me, I've given this WAY too much thought), in the last few months there have been an alarmingly high number of abandoned dog poop bags in our neighborhood. I don't get it - you walk your dog, you've bothered to bring a bag in the first place, you've scooped it up, turned the bag carefully inside out, tied a knot in the bag, and THEN you just put the bag somewhere else? You don't hold it until you find a garbage can or take it home with you? Really?

Really.

Recently I went on a 4-mile walk and found seven such bags. Without giving your TMI, let's just say they came from a wide variety of dogs. I finished my walk holding all seven bags and giving everyone something to talk about as I strolled through the neighborhood, laden with poop.

Favorite places to leave these bundles are next to signs, near fire hydrants, or in what appears to be obscure parts of other people's yards. Today I walked and saw a plastic bag with a note inside (I was all prepared to pick it up and throw it away, sure it was liter) and the note said: To Whom it May Concern: Please do not leave your dog's poop bag here."

Mind blowing.

My favorite was the New Seasons produce bag filled with poop and placed at the local grade school right next to a sign that said "School Zone." Obviously, a conscientious produce shopper. Obviously, not a conscientious neighbor.

Our friend Tom, in response to the problem, bought three garbage cans, cut holes in them, and placed signs on them that said, "Poop Can." He then chained the cans down in three strategic locations and has taken it upon himself to empty the cans and pay to have the garbage hauled away.

There seem to be three types of people in this world: Those that leave poop bags for someone else to pick up. Those that don't create a problem, and those that solve the problems created by others.