Sunday, January 16, 2011


Sadly, my friend's dear father did pass, and his memorial mass was held on Friday. I was lucky enough to get to be a part of the eulogy writing process. His children all wrote down their memories of their father, as well as the highlights of his life, and I worked with my friend to weave them all together.

It's really true what they say, no one says from their death bed, "I wish I'd spent more time at work." Here was a man that was a devoted employee and good provider for his family. He went to work right out of the Air Force and retired from the same company 39 years later. Those 39 years of committed service, however, only got one short sentence in his entire eulogy. The rest of the words spoke of a man committed to his wife, children, grandchildren, friends and faith.

I used to think the "success" of my life would be evident by the number of people who attended my funeral. The more lives I'd touched, been a part of and known, the better. To "only" have loved and been devoted to my family and closest friends, would not have been a life that had reached full potential.

The church on Friday was full. Clearly this man had made a big difference in many, many lives. However, it was the look on his widowed wife's face as she recessed down the aisle when the service was over, that said it all: This man had been successful.

Photo from


kario said...

So sorry for your friend's loss.

You will have a boatload of people at your funeral, Miss Carrie, and I'm willing to bet it will be a hoot! There will be all sorts of stories, punctuated by phrases such as OMHOG and TFBS, and everyone will miss you like mad. Your life is already successful. You have touched so many!

Elizabeth said...

I'm sorry to hear of this but heartened that you were able to help her in such a significant way. And these are wise words for all of us -- an old adage witnessed by you as Truth.

Wanda said...

Today is the first anniversary of my dad's death. Success is measured in so many different ways. A year later, I am able to see that differently.

Oh, and...ditto Kario.

deb said...

sorry for the loss of someone so obviously special
someone who lived and loved well. said...

"Those 39 years of committed service, however, only got one short sentence in his entire eulogy."

So profound.

Anonymous said...

Thank you so much for this Carrie! Watching my grandparents marriage through the years has really shown me what true love is and the great importance of family.


Deb Shucka said...

I'm so sorry for your friend's loss, and grateful that you were able to see the success of his life and perhaps begin to see yours through slightly clearer lenses.

Amber said...

Amen. This is a lesson that has been working into my soul for a bit now. Still working in, really. But the days I really get it, I also get peace inside my crazy head. And joy.


Courtney said...

Here's the line that really got to me: "I was lucky enough to get to be a part of the eulogy writing process."

Love to you, Carrie, and sympathy.

Anonymous said...

beautiful, carrie. simply beautiful.

and yes, when that day comes LONG LONG LONG into the future, the pews will be packed with those whose lives you changed, saying, 'no, not enough was ever made.'