Saturday, September 26, 2015
Mesothelioma Awareness Day
I first became aware of Heather Von St. James and her blog, Dying to Be Heard, only a couple of months ago. I had not heard of mesothelioma, and did not know if it's devastation. Won't you please take a moment to read about it, and possibly "donate" your social media? Thank you for your help!
Monday, September 14, 2015
Letting Go
I had this comment from a reader, recently, and the question has been with me ever since, "Was it hard to learn to let go? To just believe that the right things would happen? I struggle with this and just wonder if you ever do."
While I know it in my bones, and feel it in my heart, and have proof all around me, yes, I still struggle to let go and believe the right things will happen.
I'm not sure what that's all about. Probably a messy combination of being human, needing to feel in control, habit, mistaken belief that if I'm not worrying, I'm not "doing" anything, and the influence of outside voices and forces.
To spend any significant amount of time dwelling on the past, or projecting fear into the future, can whip me up into a right proper frenzy, instantly.
I think more needs to be made about the word "right," too. Do I believe the "right" things will happen? Do things have to go my way to be right? When things aren't going "right," it's very easy to fall into the trap of generalizing, globalizing, panicking and believing everything is a catastrophe. Sometimes, perhaps often, the "right" thing comes into our life wearing a clever disguise.
Wil starts his new job today. He's been out of high school for three months now, having pretty much the time of his life, doing only what he wants to do and very little of what he doesn't. He's been happy, and the temptation is to keep it that way, arranging life carefully for him, so that he only has to do the things he enjoys and finds easy. We've been working to create a volunteer job for him where he will spend most of his time doing the things he prefers, but at least part of every day he will do something that challenges him, something he doesn't necessarily like and doesn't find easy. He will have a job coach, he will have supervision, he will have support, he will have checks and balances to make sure it's all going well, but there are many aspects of his new job that I am simply not in control of.
It's very hard to let any adult child go out into the world and face the challenges you know they will face. It is particularly hard to let a special needs adult move into the world, even with a lot of support, and enter the work world. But it's time. It's necessary. It's the next step towards greater independence. It's the next step towards greater self-actualization. It's the next step towards letting go.
While I know it in my bones, and feel it in my heart, and have proof all around me, yes, I still struggle to let go and believe the right things will happen.
I'm not sure what that's all about. Probably a messy combination of being human, needing to feel in control, habit, mistaken belief that if I'm not worrying, I'm not "doing" anything, and the influence of outside voices and forces.
To spend any significant amount of time dwelling on the past, or projecting fear into the future, can whip me up into a right proper frenzy, instantly.
I think more needs to be made about the word "right," too. Do I believe the "right" things will happen? Do things have to go my way to be right? When things aren't going "right," it's very easy to fall into the trap of generalizing, globalizing, panicking and believing everything is a catastrophe. Sometimes, perhaps often, the "right" thing comes into our life wearing a clever disguise.
Wil starts his new job today. He's been out of high school for three months now, having pretty much the time of his life, doing only what he wants to do and very little of what he doesn't. He's been happy, and the temptation is to keep it that way, arranging life carefully for him, so that he only has to do the things he enjoys and finds easy. We've been working to create a volunteer job for him where he will spend most of his time doing the things he prefers, but at least part of every day he will do something that challenges him, something he doesn't necessarily like and doesn't find easy. He will have a job coach, he will have supervision, he will have support, he will have checks and balances to make sure it's all going well, but there are many aspects of his new job that I am simply not in control of.
It's very hard to let any adult child go out into the world and face the challenges you know they will face. It is particularly hard to let a special needs adult move into the world, even with a lot of support, and enter the work world. But it's time. It's necessary. It's the next step towards greater independence. It's the next step towards greater self-actualization. It's the next step towards letting go.
Wednesday, September 9, 2015
Cancel, Cancel
You may recall that my dear friend, Terry Whitaker, AKA "Toeless," once gave me a healing session (via phone) with Pat Longo. Pat is known largely through her connection to Theresa Caputo, the Long Island Medium, which is how I heard of her. She was able to help heal Theresa's anxiety, that had plagued her for years, and help her discover and accept her gift of speaking to the dead.
Anyway, this is not a post on Pat Longo, except that one thing I learned from her that has really stuck with me, is the "trick" of canceling negative thoughts before they take root and manifest into other things. She says that when you catch yourself starting to spiral, when you have a negative thought that wants to grab onto others and really get going, you say, "Cancel, cancel." You yank that thought back from the Universe and keep it from gaining any momentum. If you believe that our thoughts turn into "things," then it's important to stop the thoughts that we do not want to give strength to.
I have an iPhone, like many of you. My phone doesn't work as well, and sucks up a lot of battery usage, when I have a bunch of apps open - things I don't want open, necessarily, but have not bothered to close. I remember the day I learned the trick of double-clicking the home button, and pulling up all the open apps, then giving them a swipe and making them go away. One friend even showed the the joy of flicking them shut, and if you are really feeling feisty, using three fingers and closing the apps three-at-a-time.
In essence, by closing the apps, you are "canceling" what you don't want "out there," and are concentrating your energy for what you do.
Flick, flick, cancel, cancel.
Manifest, manifest.
Amen.
Anyway, this is not a post on Pat Longo, except that one thing I learned from her that has really stuck with me, is the "trick" of canceling negative thoughts before they take root and manifest into other things. She says that when you catch yourself starting to spiral, when you have a negative thought that wants to grab onto others and really get going, you say, "Cancel, cancel." You yank that thought back from the Universe and keep it from gaining any momentum. If you believe that our thoughts turn into "things," then it's important to stop the thoughts that we do not want to give strength to.
I have an iPhone, like many of you. My phone doesn't work as well, and sucks up a lot of battery usage, when I have a bunch of apps open - things I don't want open, necessarily, but have not bothered to close. I remember the day I learned the trick of double-clicking the home button, and pulling up all the open apps, then giving them a swipe and making them go away. One friend even showed the the joy of flicking them shut, and if you are really feeling feisty, using three fingers and closing the apps three-at-a-time.
In essence, by closing the apps, you are "canceling" what you don't want "out there," and are concentrating your energy for what you do.
Flick, flick, cancel, cancel.
Manifest, manifest.
Amen.
Wednesday, September 2, 2015
Living Autism Day-by-Day
12 years after Pamela Bryson-Weaver's son received his diagnosis of ASD, she decided to write a book about her arriving at a place of acceptance and peace, and the realization of the many blessings in her life, as a result. Since this struck very close to home, I was intrigued to see how Pamela would structure her "story." Part inspirational, part calendar, part journal, part reference, the book is aimed at busy parents/grandparents/caregivers, family and friends affected by autism spectrum disorder.
Seems like about the right amount of time - 12 years. One does not arrive at a place of acceptance, peace and the appreciation of blessings, quickly, in my experience. This book can help with that process. While faith-based, it's not preachy. The quotations are lovely, and come from a whole myriad of people. There is room to write in it, and it would be fascinating to write in it for a year, then start the book all over again, and see how your thoughts have evolved, or not.
With the numbers being 1 in 50 children being diagnosed with autism now, there are so many people that stand to benefit from the support, education and loving care this book offers. You may order your copy of Living autism day-by-day through Amazon.
Tuesday, September 1, 2015
Storm the Heavens
Wil and I recently spent a weekend at "Family Camp" with our church. Correction: we spent all day Friday, and all day Saturday at camp - we were not overnight campers. There are many things Wil enjoys about Family Camp, namely, the time to meander and chat up a lot of his favorite people. There are many things Wil does not enjoy about Family Camp, namely eating, sleeping, and using the communal bathrooms. This creates a bit of a challenge, so we decided to day trip it this year, and we experienced great success.
He made it very clear that we were to "pretend we don't know each other," he went his way, and I went mine. We would meet only after everyone but him finished dinner, then we'd head back down the mountain. Occasionally, I'd see him with a group, sometimes other adults, sometimes teenagers, sometimes younger kids, sometimes a mix. He was happy, and I was left with a whole day at camp, to fill in any way I chose, it was great.
Many of my favorite people were also at camp, so it was easy to find someone I'd been wanting to catch up with anyway, and enjoy doing just that. Sometimes I'd start talking to someone, we'd walk to wherever we needed or wanted to be, and then we'd bump into another person or group, and the weekend progressed organically, with rich conversations and time spent in community.
One such "chance" meeting had us in a small group discussion about the power of prayer. One of the people in the discussion is going through a personal challenge, and is feeling the prayers that surround her from the community. The question came up about whether there was just as much power coming from one single, focused, ernest, prayerful person, as there was when a whole group was praying. Do we need to "storm the heavens" for God to hear us?
My uneducated response is, yes and no. I don't feel like God requires a "petition," with a certain number of names on it before "He" starts to pay attention, refusing to move our little prayer to the top of "His" pile until it has all the pre-requisites. Certainly, one "little" prayer is heard.
I think, instead, that prayer is energy, and raises vibration. I think that God/Universe/call-it-what-you-will, is love. I think that love is energy. I think that when we truly pray (as opposed to wishing), we are aligning our energy with that of God's, and raising the vibration. The more souls raising the vibration, the more energy and love there is - which, in effect, "storms the heavens."
He made it very clear that we were to "pretend we don't know each other," he went his way, and I went mine. We would meet only after everyone but him finished dinner, then we'd head back down the mountain. Occasionally, I'd see him with a group, sometimes other adults, sometimes teenagers, sometimes younger kids, sometimes a mix. He was happy, and I was left with a whole day at camp, to fill in any way I chose, it was great.
Many of my favorite people were also at camp, so it was easy to find someone I'd been wanting to catch up with anyway, and enjoy doing just that. Sometimes I'd start talking to someone, we'd walk to wherever we needed or wanted to be, and then we'd bump into another person or group, and the weekend progressed organically, with rich conversations and time spent in community.
One such "chance" meeting had us in a small group discussion about the power of prayer. One of the people in the discussion is going through a personal challenge, and is feeling the prayers that surround her from the community. The question came up about whether there was just as much power coming from one single, focused, ernest, prayerful person, as there was when a whole group was praying. Do we need to "storm the heavens" for God to hear us?
My uneducated response is, yes and no. I don't feel like God requires a "petition," with a certain number of names on it before "He" starts to pay attention, refusing to move our little prayer to the top of "His" pile until it has all the pre-requisites. Certainly, one "little" prayer is heard.
I think, instead, that prayer is energy, and raises vibration. I think that God/Universe/call-it-what-you-will, is love. I think that love is energy. I think that when we truly pray (as opposed to wishing), we are aligning our energy with that of God's, and raising the vibration. The more souls raising the vibration, the more energy and love there is - which, in effect, "storms the heavens."
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